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Don’t be afraid to make the first move: Do “traditional” dating rules apply in online dating (i.e. Truthfully, I don’t think traditional dating rules should apply in offline dating. Write a quality first message: We all know competition is fierce in the online dating world, so why waste time writing non-memorable introductory messages?

A commenter on my “Three Mistakes …” piece said someone kept messaging them the word “hi.” Just “hi.” I don’t think that really “wowed” them.

So what are the elements of this message that appealed to me?

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In short, NZDating provides a comfortable, safe and fun environment for meeting others in your area from the comfort and safety of your home or workplace. or join for free now It's bigger NZDating has by far the largest number of New Zealand users of any dating sites - the more members, the more choice, the more likely you'll have a great time meeting new people just like you.

Throughout it all, what became most apparent during the discussion is that men didn’t want a “don’t” list. What they really want is some advice on what I hesitated to even write this piece because what people like is far more subjective than what people don’t like. To that end, this is my list “to do’s” for people (yes, people, not just men) who are trying to find a long-term partner using an online dating site:1.

To oversimplify what I mean, let’s take coffee for example. Only use current photos in your profile: One of the most common complaints I hear from men is that women frequently misrepresent themselves in their photos by using old photos (sometimes decades old) or by cropping them in too tightly so you don’t realize they are of a certain body type.

There’s something to be said about keeping your introductory message brief and casual.

The personal touch shows you’re genuinely interested, but the brevity and non-committal tone shows you know you’re special, too, so you’re willing to walk away. Remember what you’re up against (now’s a good time to refer back to my “Three Mistakes …” piece to read about some of the behaviors that turn women off to online dating).

Online dating is now widely accepted as a valid, convenient & fun way of meeting like-minded people.

New Zealanders using have found meeting people online is more convenient and comfortable than through 'normal' offline channels such as bars and parties.

Personally, I didn’t like to feel pressured; I wanted the chance to really get to know people before deciding if I wanted to date them, so men who offered the same kind of casual confidence really got my attention.9. Well, most of the time you probably won’t even get a response. Women frequently receive messages that are sexually crude or downright mean and nasty.

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